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Albo Decides To Spend All Our Cash on Footy. Thanks Albo! – SATIRE

‘Tony’ as they call him down at Souths training, often throws a ‘no look pass’ to team mates and it looks like he has done it again, throwing hundreds of millions behind what will be a rival to his beloved Souths.

Anthony Albanese has decided that we as a nation will provide another nearby nation with more than $600 million of our money, which could be spent on us and or those less fortunate than us, in our own country, so that those less fortunate than us in Papua New Guinea, another country, can instead be distracted for 30 weeks of the year like us, and watch the NRL.

PNG residents will soon find themselves arguing over which team is the best and why Parramatta can’t break their 37 year drought for more than half the year instead of focussing on poor government, overpaid bureaucrats, ICAC scandals and everyday problems such as huge excise on beer, fuel and tobacco, poor prices for lamb and beef and the things in life the majority of the Australian population needs to survive.

Being used as pawns in a military struggle definitely isn’t on the agenda for the indigenous people of PNG, who were last dragged into a conflict during WWll when they were known as Fuzzy Wuzzy Angels.

Albanese took time out yesterday from telling anyone he could that he was a Souths supporter and that he grew up in public housing, before reinforcing the public housing part, for anyone who may not have heard him say that part.

   Souths owner Russell Crowe was asked by a reporter if he would be happy to see the PM change teams and find a new side in the ‘far, far north of Australia,’ but was not willing to comment, before a reporter overheard him say to Latrell that “The quicker we get him out of here the better, hey Trell?”

Leaked government documents show that Albanese hopes it will be a quicker way to employ an army than to breed, pay, migrate and construct his own in Australia, if things go pear shaped in the pacific. With more than 10 million Papuans on Australia’s doorstep and less than 60 thousand in Australia’s armed forces, if the shit hits the fan over barley or Griffith wine again, Australia won’t have to go down the diplomatic path.

Watch this space, despite never passing an oval shaped ball that hit anyone on the chest, never kicking a 40/20, never making a tackle and never chip kicking over the top, Albo is going to grow the game.

If that’s the only legacy he leaves the country, it’s not too bad! Because no one is sure what he has done so far.

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